Blessings of the week.
This has not been a great week. The first part of it was pretty nice - we spent the weekend at my in-laws, and Thomas was able to spend time with his family, which he doesn't get to do that often. Monday through Wednesday I was able to spend time with my family, which I get to do more often, but it was nice to be able to sit and relax, and spend time with all the kitties. I love the cats, even when they're getting fur everywhere, and making me sneeze. There's nothing so relaxing as falling asleep with a kitty purring next to you.
However.
Isn't it funny how we take the good things in stride, but when we have failings, or frustrations, we let them consume us? They are just as much a "normal" part of life as the highs are, but for some reason we focus on them 3x more. Or at least I do.
Once I got 'home' to the townhouse we're renting, I started having doubts and disappointments. It seemed as soon as I got back, things started falling apart left and right. We're having trouble getting a date on when to move into our house, and I left some very important things at my parents house, that accidentally got thrown away. Thomas was already stressed out from the week, and when I came home, he expected a wife who would be sympathetic and a shoulder to learn on... not quite so. The culmination came this morning when Thomas got called into work, which left me having to go to church all on my own. We'd only been once before, and I did NOT want to go to this new church with new people all by myself. It took all I had to get dressed, put myself into the car, and go into the church building.
Normally this is when someone would break out in how much they were spiritually fulfilled by being where they were supposed to be, or some scripture that jumped out at them, etc, but that's not exactly what happened. I went to church, sat by myself, smiled when smiled at, introduced myself to lots of people whose names I immediately forgot - but I managed to stay there for all. three. hours. That, in itself, is an accomplishment. For someone who hates being in new situations, feels horribly uncomfortable taking to people I don't know (as well as those I do know) as well as being uncomfortably pregnant at the moment, I felt that this was a big accomplishment for me. I didn't have any big spiritual moment, just a quiet recognition to myself that even in moments like these, I'm not alone.
When I came home, I made chicken salad. Cooking has been an interesting thing for me lately. I really like cooking, I'd even say I'm good at it, but it takes motivation to do so. It takes a willingness to prepare, to plan and to premeditate - all of which are things I am NOT good at. Other than putting a chicken in the crockpot yesterday, I haven't cooked a good meal since I came back home, because I was grouchy, and didn't want to go through the effort.
But today, I made a chicken salad. A really really good chicken salad, that I had READY as my husband walked in the door from a frustrating morning at work. That never happens! And I felt truly blessed as we sat down in front of a Veggie Tales DVD, munching on our lunch together. This is a really tough moment in our lives. We're racing against the clock trying to buy a house, and make sure we're ready for this baby to pop into our lives, and it's very stressful. But we are not alone in all this. We have such a wonderful family who has gone beyond themselves making sure we have the things we need, and giving us help, and comfort. We have each other - which can make things more stressful very often, but I am lucky that my husband is a wonderfully forgiving man, and I am learning from his example. (And dare I say he's learning from my patience?)
We also have a loving Father in Heaven, who makes it clear to me in little ways how much he is looking out for us - and how much he is looking out for ME. On a whim I drove by our house-to-be after church, and it lead me through some beautiful scenery as I took the back route home. I have no doubt that this was a gift for me today.
"See? The trees are blooming, and the cows are playing, and the grass smells sweet. Everything is going to be fine."
However.
Isn't it funny how we take the good things in stride, but when we have failings, or frustrations, we let them consume us? They are just as much a "normal" part of life as the highs are, but for some reason we focus on them 3x more. Or at least I do.
Once I got 'home' to the townhouse we're renting, I started having doubts and disappointments. It seemed as soon as I got back, things started falling apart left and right. We're having trouble getting a date on when to move into our house, and I left some very important things at my parents house, that accidentally got thrown away. Thomas was already stressed out from the week, and when I came home, he expected a wife who would be sympathetic and a shoulder to learn on... not quite so. The culmination came this morning when Thomas got called into work, which left me having to go to church all on my own. We'd only been once before, and I did NOT want to go to this new church with new people all by myself. It took all I had to get dressed, put myself into the car, and go into the church building.
Normally this is when someone would break out in how much they were spiritually fulfilled by being where they were supposed to be, or some scripture that jumped out at them, etc, but that's not exactly what happened. I went to church, sat by myself, smiled when smiled at, introduced myself to lots of people whose names I immediately forgot - but I managed to stay there for all. three. hours. That, in itself, is an accomplishment. For someone who hates being in new situations, feels horribly uncomfortable taking to people I don't know (as well as those I do know) as well as being uncomfortably pregnant at the moment, I felt that this was a big accomplishment for me. I didn't have any big spiritual moment, just a quiet recognition to myself that even in moments like these, I'm not alone.
When I came home, I made chicken salad. Cooking has been an interesting thing for me lately. I really like cooking, I'd even say I'm good at it, but it takes motivation to do so. It takes a willingness to prepare, to plan and to premeditate - all of which are things I am NOT good at. Other than putting a chicken in the crockpot yesterday, I haven't cooked a good meal since I came back home, because I was grouchy, and didn't want to go through the effort.
But today, I made a chicken salad. A really really good chicken salad, that I had READY as my husband walked in the door from a frustrating morning at work. That never happens! And I felt truly blessed as we sat down in front of a Veggie Tales DVD, munching on our lunch together. This is a really tough moment in our lives. We're racing against the clock trying to buy a house, and make sure we're ready for this baby to pop into our lives, and it's very stressful. But we are not alone in all this. We have such a wonderful family who has gone beyond themselves making sure we have the things we need, and giving us help, and comfort. We have each other - which can make things more stressful very often, but I am lucky that my husband is a wonderfully forgiving man, and I am learning from his example. (And dare I say he's learning from my patience?)
We also have a loving Father in Heaven, who makes it clear to me in little ways how much he is looking out for us - and how much he is looking out for ME. On a whim I drove by our house-to-be after church, and it lead me through some beautiful scenery as I took the back route home. I have no doubt that this was a gift for me today.
"See? The trees are blooming, and the cows are playing, and the grass smells sweet. Everything is going to be fine."
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